So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I just found a bag of teeth...
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
