god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
