I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Randomize
