you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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