There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Randomize
