i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
We left the knife in your bed.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
try to milk me bitch
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Randomize
