she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
