last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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