Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
