U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
The struggles of a small town man whore
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
