i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
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