He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I pour the whiskey from now on
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Randomize
