we're blogging at a bar
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
