well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
