we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
