sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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