Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
