hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
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