Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
