i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
