if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
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