Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
