People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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