i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize
