Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize
