last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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