Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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