Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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