You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
