They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
it glows. i had to have it.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
