You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
