You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Randomize
