The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Randomize
