Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize