I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
