I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
