WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Randomize