Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
