when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
