69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
