...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Randomize