i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
