Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
