Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Randomize
