I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
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