woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
