3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
