Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
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