After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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