she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
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